I don't know what it is, but those two seem to go together somehow.
The day after arriving in Aarupata I attended a wedding. I was able to identify the bride and groom because she was crying hysterically and he looked enormously uncomfortable. "Love matches" are becoming more and more common, but many marriages are still arranged here. I'm not sure which type this particular marriage was, but I'm happy to report that I've seen the couple since and they look wonderfully happy together. It seems it is traditional for the bride to cry because it is hard for her to leave her family (after marriage the bride typically leaves her home town and moves in with her in-laws and becomes part of their family).
I've been to several weddings since then, some huge and fancy, most small and cozy.
They're nothing like American weddings. Friends and family members give a white tika to the bride and groom and their attendants as a way to give their blessing on the union. There's often feasting and dancing and they always end far too late at night. I get really grouchy when I'm tired, so I'm afraid that has rather tainted my opinion of weddings.
Funerals are a little more interesting. Each cast and ethnic group has different death rituals. Gurungs, with whom I live, bury their dead while most other groups use cremation. Not long ago my host dad's elderly aunt died of cancer. The experience was something you would expect to see in a National Geographic and I can't possibly describe it adequately, but I'll try. Throughout the day people gathered at the diseased home to very loudly mourn her passing. As evening started to approach, garlands of money were sewn together and other colorful decorations were procured. The body was wrapped in cloth then festooned with these decorations. Religious ceremonies and dancing were preformed, then around midnight the men carried the body up to the cemetery for burial. For several days afterwards all the gathered family spent most of our time hanging out together and planning the big death party that was to take place 15 days later.
"Death party" probably isn't the appropriate term for what happened, but It's the best way I know of to describe it. Far more happened than I am aware of or understood or that I can describe. This is a brief summary only. The four day gathering celebrated six different diseased ancestors. Family from far and near gathered to join in. The school was turned into a temporary camp ground where people would hangout throughout the day just chatting or creating money and flower garlands that were used later.
Then manikins representing the diseased were carried into the village and placed on a platform in a tent constructed for the event.
The manikins were then dressed up and decorated.
A group of young men played drums and danced around the figures for hours and hours. Their endurance was impressive.
Other religious ceremonies were also performed.
One night there was a special dance depicting the fight between good and evil. A group of priests (representing good) and a group of "son-in-laws" (any male relative really, representing evil) chased each other back and forth across a field, but in the end good always won.
Unfortunately, that same night a man in the next village down who had had a bit too much to drink fell to his death.
The party was a huge event. Whether you were related or not, everyone in the area came to watch.
The main thing I learned was that death is expensive everywhere, even if you don't have to buy a fancy box or cemetery plot.
The day after arriving in Aarupata I attended a wedding. I was able to identify the bride and groom because she was crying hysterically and he looked enormously uncomfortable. "Love matches" are becoming more and more common, but many marriages are still arranged here. I'm not sure which type this particular marriage was, but I'm happy to report that I've seen the couple since and they look wonderfully happy together. It seems it is traditional for the bride to cry because it is hard for her to leave her family (after marriage the bride typically leaves her home town and moves in with her in-laws and becomes part of their family).
I've been to several weddings since then, some huge and fancy, most small and cozy.
They're nothing like American weddings. Friends and family members give a white tika to the bride and groom and their attendants as a way to give their blessing on the union. There's often feasting and dancing and they always end far too late at night. I get really grouchy when I'm tired, so I'm afraid that has rather tainted my opinion of weddings.
Funerals are a little more interesting. Each cast and ethnic group has different death rituals. Gurungs, with whom I live, bury their dead while most other groups use cremation. Not long ago my host dad's elderly aunt died of cancer. The experience was something you would expect to see in a National Geographic and I can't possibly describe it adequately, but I'll try. Throughout the day people gathered at the diseased home to very loudly mourn her passing. As evening started to approach, garlands of money were sewn together and other colorful decorations were procured. The body was wrapped in cloth then festooned with these decorations. Religious ceremonies and dancing were preformed, then around midnight the men carried the body up to the cemetery for burial. For several days afterwards all the gathered family spent most of our time hanging out together and planning the big death party that was to take place 15 days later.
"Death party" probably isn't the appropriate term for what happened, but It's the best way I know of to describe it. Far more happened than I am aware of or understood or that I can describe. This is a brief summary only. The four day gathering celebrated six different diseased ancestors. Family from far and near gathered to join in. The school was turned into a temporary camp ground where people would hangout throughout the day just chatting or creating money and flower garlands that were used later.
Then manikins representing the diseased were carried into the village and placed on a platform in a tent constructed for the event.
The manikins were then dressed up and decorated.
A group of young men played drums and danced around the figures for hours and hours. Their endurance was impressive.
Other religious ceremonies were also performed.
One night there was a special dance depicting the fight between good and evil. A group of priests (representing good) and a group of "son-in-laws" (any male relative really, representing evil) chased each other back and forth across a field, but in the end good always won.
Unfortunately, that same night a man in the next village down who had had a bit too much to drink fell to his death.
The party was a huge event. Whether you were related or not, everyone in the area came to watch.
The main thing I learned was that death is expensive everywhere, even if you don't have to buy a fancy box or cemetery plot.
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